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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Monday.....and vomit.

This is a middle finger Monday, this weekend was less than fun. Last week the baby had a little tummy problem but he got over it really fast. Buttttt, on Friday the rest of the family started up with the same siptums. By Saturday the wife, sister and brother in law and the mother in law were going out both ends. And if you have ever had a stomache virus you know what I mean. It was nasty, I can handle lots of things but vomit is one thing I can not handle! The thought, the sight and exspecally the smell will send me running for the hills. But since I cannt run from my family I did what I always do when confronted with bad stinkies: I turn off my nose. I have learned to do this over the years by breath out my mouth and bypassing the nose. I have been doing it for 3 days now and I now have to unlearn this habit a little. Mainly because I cannt stand the way mouth breathers look. If you are one of those ppl out there I call 'mouth breathers' take a look at one of your fellow mouth breathers and tell me how it looks. People always assume things, for example: peopel that drive IROC's are Italian, short tan men on bicycles are Mexicans, all white ppl like mayo, and ppl that walk around with their mouths open are not the brightest light-bright toy on the shelf.
I read a book about dressing for sucess when I was a kid, it gave all kinds of advice on how to look your best to get that job you wanted. Looking the part was the number one thing and looking smart was the key. It worked off of how others see you, not how you really are. People assume that ppl that wear glasses, speak without the use of slang and stand with proper posture are smart. Not always true, I can fool the best of ya haha! And in the book it interviewed employers and asked them what they saw in one person verse the ohter. The book went in all kinds of directions from their schooling, dress, hygene, hand shake and facial exspressions. The one big killer was, you guessed it : Mouth Breathing. From that day on I made it my mission to fool everyone. Stand tall, wear glasses, have a firm hand shake, speak the language of your superiors, and never ever stand in your bosses office with a blank look on my face breathing out my mouth.
I know this has been bit of a werid rant but oh well. I am just fucking around today and avoiding any real work. And what better way than to type up a storm on my blog about mouth breathers lmao!
But all kidding aside, if you walk around with your mouth open, shut it. A fly might mozzy on in and make his home in dar befo ya know it. And if ya dont like what eyes ban saying har,

Sit on this and rotate mofo!

Oh yeah, someone wanted to play truth or dare on Monday(sorry I cannt remeber who said this, I have not had any coffe yet)......not sure how this is going to play out but if anyone has a truth or dare for me fire away! I am angry and tired and ready for anything!

8 comments:

Becky said...

Truth or Dare, on my blog today, no one has seemed to show up yet, but am sure people will after lunch when work gets really really boring.... Or is it just me....

honkeie said...

hahahaha the_mrs hahahaha. Speel chek wahts dat?
I should, maybe the next one i will just for you :-*

Blondie... said...

Truth or dare Monday? LOL, I'd be the dork asking for "truth". haha

Mouth breathers freak me out but I understand the technique to avoid noxious odors.

Just thinking of the vomit smell makes me gag a bit.

starbender said...

Ha haa!
I see more of George
flippin it.
I missed the whole truth N dare thing! ---
I had 2 swipe a pic. from here!
U can C it at...
http://passinggasnow.blogspot.com/
->TRUTH OR DARE?<-
;]

Danielle said...

your are nuts

honkeie said...

Truth: I spent the whole night walking back and forth from the couch to the potty. I now have the stomach virus. And I am at work today!

honkeie said...

Thanks normi

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