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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Friday, September 16, 2005


I am sure most ppl out there rember Speak & Spell. It was a great learning tool for those children with problems with phonics and those that wanted to sound like a mentally handicaped robot. But it was also the source of much entertainment once a young child realized they could get Mr. Speak&Spell to say naughty words. Then a whole new can of worms opened for them on how to shock the prude family members that thought words as innocent as "freakin" were nasty. I myself played with this thing until it just broke and by then I was onto much better naughty joys. But I still get a kick out of using the dictionary to look up nasty things, but now I use modern tools.....Dictionary....and look up words like anus, rectum(it nearly killedem), vagina, jack ass and soo on. I am sure many ppl can relate to this, what else is there to do when you are drunk and you are tired of the porn, myspace and too drunk to blog. Even though I have blogged bombed out of my mind and would not recommend it. You will delete it soon as you sober up a tad.

As I have mentioned in the past , I have a little one at home and started buying him things to keep him entertained. We got him a learning tool, some kinda green worm with letters on its feet. It says the letters, sings, and even gives a pronuciation to the letters. Now if you are on the same page as I am you know where I am going with this. For those of you who have no clue to the dept of my nasty side.....When you put certain sounds together you get bad words. The "S" and the "T" when pushed one after the other sounds like "SSSTT" or..shit! But---the makers of this toy had ppl like me in mind when they made this thing. It will not let you do this no matter what combonation you use. Pressing the letter "F" and the letter "U" in alphabet mode should say f u, but instead when you press the "F" key and then the"U" key it says, " F heheheheheehehehe" then you have to wait a few seconds before it say "U". It wont say f u! Nor will it say "SSTT", everytime you try to use a combonation of letters or sounds to say something nasty the little fuck laughs at you.

That is such a shame that they took that joy from us perverted parents who's maturity levels are lower than their own children's. But what is even funnier is that some corpurit big wig had to ok the programing of this block on bad words. I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall in that think tan lol. Seeing a bunch of tech geeks trying to figure out what combonations of words on this baby toy would produce a sound that would result in a fine for someone like Howard Stern. What ever happened to the days when children got dangerous and evil toys as presents, anyone remeber LAWN DARTS... ?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

omigod.. i remember those.. I used to love the speak and spell. I too made the "bad" words... my dad used to think it was funny when I made it say SHIT! lol...

Do you remember the keychains that made the bomb noises and guns? They also made them with the swear words. phrases such as "Your and asshole" "Eat shit" "Fuck you" and one other thing that I can't remember. Those were the days!

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