- I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.
Friday, September 29, 2006
I have been working some crazy overtime these past few weeks and last night was no different. I came in at 0300 hrs and will be here until 1500hrs, so lets just say I am feeling a little off these few days. I have not been eating right and my sleep is way off so I am all discombobulated! I sooo need to drink and the wife unit is being driven mad with the evil midgets at home .....soo she needs to drink. I am very glad that booze is still legal, if were not for alcohol I dont think people would have kids lol.
Here let me show u how off I am........Last night while walking around my job I found these little cup thingies in our first aide kits. And below u will find me using them for something other than what they are ment for.
1) I come in peace....peas...pees....oh hell just take me to your leader, and if he isnt smarter than a toad then we wont kill you! (boy are we in for a world of hurt)
2) Crazy good!
3) I come from France!
The baby has started his no sleeping at night so the wife unit is a little frazzled these days. He sleeps in the day but soon as 2300 roles around he is wide awake. So I think we will be adding some caffiene to his titty milk to keep him awake during the day. If he is awake all day he should sleep at night.......right? But I think we will keep a bottle of happiness next to the bed so when he goes all night fussing and bitching we can too-with a smile on our faces.
-Swing away bitch I feel no pain- hahahahahahahaaha
Now since I am watching my diet a little bit there will be no beer for me, maybe I will go this route:
I have a question for anyone who might know something on this topic:
Is absinthe legal?
I have been looking it up on the net and I have found a few places to buy it but I dont know about the legality of this product. I dont want the mail police kicking my door down because I order something that was illegal. Like those jackasses that buy weed on the net, that is just stoopid...........well nevermind on that i just found the answer on Absinthe's Buyers Guide. Go there to learn all about it. I am on a mission to get some though, I know it isnt legal in the USA because the FDA wont approve it for different reasons. But I am on a quest, if anyone has some let me know and we can party lol.
Happy Friday people...........lets all get CRUNCKED!
Thursday, September 28, 2006
But here are the pics, now these are all G rated no nakies today sorry. :-P
"Does anyone know where to get Monica flavored cigars?"
I went to one of fav web sites today...photobucket and searched 'hnt' and here is what I found...
1) Very nice butt hmmmmm.......
2) Ahhhh I am blind!
3) Getting better :-D
Now if these pics happen to belong to anyone visiting let me know and I will take it down. But you put your face out on the net be ready for some criticism and theft lol.
But I am off to spend my day in a haze, lack of sleep does not help my horney levels though. The less sleep I get the worse I get.......if that is even possible at this point.
I just change my little picture thingie to something I found on photobucket. I thought it was funny and I am hoping it will offened someone.....lets see haha...
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
I have seen this on a few blogs in the past few days and I thought it would be fun to steal the idea. I have no idea who thought of it first and since they did not put there name on it, we can all use it like a 2 dollar whore.
- I dont like beer.
- Women are nasty and icky.
- Choclate should not be eaten for breakfast, lunch and diner.
- No thanks I am full
- Real men dont masterbate
- I will try anything once
- I cannt accept a free drink
- Buffets are the worst places to eat
- I have never riden a horse
- Motorcycles are for pussies
- We should not nuke Iraq
- We need to get rid of all guns and replace them with flowers
- I dont eat meat
- I am fabulous thanks for asking-with a lisp-
- 80's music sucks
- I am happy with the body I have
- Pizza is gross
- Last but not least: Sex, who needs that?
Now Normie said something that got me thinking on my last post. I am all for breast but I am really a feet, leg and butt kinda guy. One of my first skin mags as a preteen male was 'Leg Show' the next was 'Ass Man' and then 'Voluptious' That about covers what I love in a woman, nice feet in a pair of thigh highs, round bootie and a curvy body. I have been called a chubby chaser and boy do I lovem round. Here let me show u some more pics of what I like, and it will add to the Happy Hump Day theme most ppl use on this day lol:
I found this chic on photobucket so she isnt just some internet flooshy. She is real and a real freak to boot.
Same woman......if you are interested in looking her up at photobucket her name is sjames8
I am going to stop with these pics for a hot second because I am about to pop here at my desk and it isnt helping my condition. Lack-o-nookie.
But have a good one people and have a happy Hump Day, I am working a double tonight so I might post more today. I will be back in at 11pm tonight and will not be going home until 3 pm tommorrow.
The baby and mommy are doing great and little man is doing good as well. He is acting up a little bit more than usual but I can deal with that, better than reverting back to diapers and stilling the babies binkies.
I CANNT HELP MYSELF----------this is the last one I promise......
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
-And to just to warn anyone here this is a very ADULT post with many pictures of adult things so if little ones are near or you are a religous prude please do not read any farther-
The little woman's cooter is in the shop for repairs and just so, I guess mine would be too if it just took a beating like that. So my horny level is beyond understanding at the moment. I am about to post some pictures that have caught my attention these past few weeks. I will warn u again this is not for the faint of heart or anyone who finds the female body offensive......
Now on with the show.......High Hoe High Hoe its of to pay to bits to see two tits High Hoe High Hoe!
1) I am smiling right along ppl!
2) I can almost hear them clapping.
3) Hell yes!
4) Nuff said!
5) last one......I know she isnt real but it gets me everytime!
6) Ok I lied!
I would put more but I have to go its feeding time at the zoo.
Monday, September 25, 2006
This weekend went to fast, go really drunk on Saturday night with Panama Jack Rum and some coke. And not the sniffng kind haha. I was at home so nothing really happened, drinking at home is so boring haha. I did see some good movies: Full Metal Jacket, Unleashed, Doom and Spoonge Bob. I am going to do post on Spoonge Bob, what I saw in that movie had me rolling and I have to share my thoughts. But not now I am assed out for the moment. But before I run to hide and take another nap let me show two ahhhh inspiring pics.
1) Here we have little man eating some real southern goodness: GRITS. I made them because I was hungry and that was all we had. And lucky for me I can read direction and boil water hahahahaah.
2) Here we have the glow worm showing us his best impression of the President of China. He has it down pat, all he needs is a pair of large glasses and he will have the perfect Halloween costume. The evil guy from Team America, I cannt think of his name.
Have a happy Monday I am too out of it to continue, not even spell check can help me now!
Friday, September 22, 2006
I am not saying abouse them but use them to do things like picking up garbage along the highway, landscaping, bathroom doodie in Penn Station, and the more violent ones can entertain us like back in the Roman days. If you are on death row for a violent crime I am all for putting a dead bloody animal on their backs and sending them into a den of lions. They make it out alive they can get something nice, like some nice prison sex and a warm shower. And I know there are some people in there that are probably nice guys who just made a mistake or two so the petty criminals can just do the dinky jobs and give them a little hourly wage. And with the money they could make they could make their stay in the pen a little better. Men who are happy fight the least.
We had the babies 2 week doctors visit and all checked out. Here we have the older brother being still for about 2 seconds. He was a good little drunken midget for about a bink of an eye.
I learned something new that day: That mothers milk gives the babies female hormones which cause their nipples to be puffy and lactate! Did u hear me, lactate as in making milk! My baby boy has milk glads!
But the doctor said that will go away an not to stress his bitch titties. As his manliness takes over they will go away. What a relief, I had a boy damn it.
He grew, he is almost 21 inchs and he also gain some poundage. I forget what it was but it was good enough to give him all checks on his chart. He did not get any shots this time but the next visit in 2 months they will start will the evil stabbings. Man life just sucks from the get go huh?
After we left we went to feed the soul a little at the evil place---McDonalds. The little man knows this place too well thanks to those damn commercials. He loved the climbing thingie they had there but he would get stuck at the top. He was a little scared of the drop from the different levels. It wasnt more that maybe 2 feet but it was a little too far for him. But after a little incouragement he climbed down on his own.
He was trying to pic his nose if you are wondering what he is doing lol.
I have to run, work is a little buisy today. Hope everyone has a great non sober weekend.
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
-Now I know that I am missing a few important ingredients for the meth we all love but I am not about to give out the whole thing, all I need is some ass to say he found a 'how to make you own meth' on my blog- and I also, for the record, have never made or used meth. It has to be one of the nastiest drugs out there.-
Kmart also sells ScotchGuard, many ppl have been killed or put into a comma after huffing that. They also sell spray paint which can also be used to huff and deface public property. The list can go on with the other dangerous things they sell but she was upset by the obvious dangerous item. That just shows me how narrow minded this person is. And the fact she is not protesting car dealerships is mind boggling, cars killed more ppl last year than gun violence. Hmmmmmm lets do back ground checks on everyone before they buy a car and if they have past tickets and DWI's they should not be allowed to by a new car.
-She has a big mouth and can't seem to keep it shut about anything that she finds to be wrong in the world. I do the same thing but I don't end up in the eveing news spouting bullshit about things I really know very little about. Her newest podium is radical Christianity. Now I agree with her on this but not completely. She said and I quote " Radical Christianity is as threatening as radical Islam."
Now I agree with this and both should be stamped out. Self righteous religious wackos under mind humanity and progression to the point you would think the age of reason never happened. But if she thinks Christianity wackos are bad then she should try to walk a mile in the shoes of a woman living in the world of wacko Islam. I will take the crazy Christian's any day, they are just annoying and are easily sent on there way by slamming your front door in their faces. And since she believes these two couch case religions are the same level lets see what would have become of this rolly polly pseudo celebrity if Islam had rein here.
-She would be dressed head to toe in a burka, which for the rest of the world is a blessing. Her gay lifestyle would be non existent, in their world you come out of the closet you head right to the grave. To make it even better in Islam women are seen as second class citizens so all of her money and celebrity status would be non existent. Freedom of speech, not likely. Go on TV in their country and blast Islam you would have a fatwa issued sooo fast calling for her death she probably would not make it home that day.
-So in the end I think that there is a huge difference between the two and again Rosie shows her ignorance. Why can't they keep the most ignorant of us off the TV, it makes us all look bad. I mean keep GW off the TV unless he has a tele-promoter and someone telling hm what to say. He isn't as stoopid as ppl make him out to be, he is just a good ol boy from Texas that likes barbq's beer, fireworks and strippers. He is just under the microscope more than any of us, I saw him on a Christmas special one year and they had him on film lip syncing to the songs and it was very obvious he did not know the words to any of the songs. I don't know them all that well either but I am not on national TV wearing a 10 gallon hat mouthing the wrong words to 'O Holy Night' haha!
But let me share with you a pic I found of the source of my rant today. The pic is soo funny for so many ways. See if you can find the lesbian joke reference in the pic. By the way I have nothing agaist her sexuality, I am all man and I love lesbians, I can relate to them haha. And if it were not for our country's freedoms she would not even be able to blast other peoples lives and religions.
(Hint:Notice what the little board by here head says)
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Here is another pic from my moms house of the weeman aka- Mr Grumpers. He looks like he is about to bust out in song lol.
Here is a pic I took on the way to work on Monday. Vanity plates always get me, I might get one someday. But mine will say "HONKEIE", so if you ever see that in NJ it might just be me hahaha.
And here is a random internet pic of someone I will never know. I found this while I was in photobucket looking for pics of 'boobs' You will be suprised the things you find after you go looking for them in a search engine. I am not sure what is going on here but I want one of those things.....even though I am on the dry wagon for a while, I just got my cholesterol tested and it came back kinda high. I am now embarking(sp) on a bit of a health kick to get things back in line. Better now than later when I am old and tired.
And thanks for all the advice, I am going to look into a few places to take my blog. I would love to start my own web page but I have no Idea how that works or who to even go to to buy one. I would love to have my own little peice of trailer park heaven on the net!
Monday, September 18, 2006
But enough of my ranting about blogger, there is nothing I can do about it now. I did manage to get a few pics up from my weekend. We - I mean I took down the pool this weekend. I still need to roll it up and put the shell in the shed but it is down. I even used our new shop vac to get the last bit of water out of the bottom, much better that what happened last year. Water flooding everything, but this time I pumped it out into the street.
We took a trip to my moms house on Sunday. She told us something interesting, has anyone heard of the biker gang: The Pegans? Well aparantly they are lots of them here in NJ exspecally in Manville and their hangout is this shit bar called 'The PoorMans Pub' My mom told us that last weekend they were all at this local park having some kind of end of summer cook out. After she told me that all the signs of redneck USA fit. All the trashy ppl, lack of teeth in the women, weird stores and the over abundance of little dive bars. Its bike bitch heaven in Manville, only minutes from my moms house. too funny.
This is one of the pics taken there that is now my screen saver at work.
I have to run, this post has taken me over 2 hours to do with all the problems I have and the wife being at school. As I said in the previous post blog at home is almost not an option.
-But till then let me bore u with some nothingness in my hollow man brain. And what fills a mans mind more than thoughts of food and beer? SEX and boy is that on my mind right now. I even have to wear tighty whities to keep the monster at bay. When I wear grippies I can walk around somewhat normal at full mast. With boxers I have to do the 'Up and Tuck' trick which doesnt go well with my work attire. And for those of you who dont know what that is, It is where you take your fully awaken manhood and point him in the up direction tucked behind your belt and cover it with your shirt. It is a great position to have him in to flash the wife unit while in line at the grocery store to shock the crap out of her. She never knows what to say when she gets an eye full of willie in publick like that lol.
The funny thing is I have not even been thinking about sex lately I am just that ready to go he wakes up on his own. I start my day with morning wood and end my night with bed time wood, hell I can do push ups with both hands tied behind my back! Seven days of no sex makes on weak......or in my case temporarily insane. I killed 2 bugs the other day that were mating in mid flight because I was pissed they were getting some and I was not. AND I AM ON TOP OF THE FOOD CHAIN HERE DAMN IT!-----sorry I got a little loud for a minute. I know this is only until her cooter is back in buisness so while its in the shop getting the needed repairs I will have to stay in the self serve lane for a while. But as I have seen that only helps for about an hour or two. There is something about the horizontal mombo that karate on the pottie just cannt replace. I am trying as we speak to calm down so I can walk outside to go get my car but I am having some trouble. I am sooo glad that I work behind a desk for the most part, I could have my pants off and no one would know the difference. My Monday paperwork has me some what buisy and keeps my mind on the mindless world of cubical life but even that becomes sexually driven after a while: "I slam the stapler down on top of the paper like a pile driver sandwiching them toghter in a tight stack. I pull open the filing cabinet in one hard jerk rattling it like a bed post in the grip of a woman lost in moment. I plunge the pencil into the sharpener with all my might to get the end all the way in for the best tip." Wow that so did not help.........I am out for the moment but I will be back later....have a Happy Horny Monday ppl....
Friday, September 15, 2006
"Brohters charged with growing pot off Rt. 280"
This is article is just to funny, these two brothers started growing weed in a 3,ooo foot cannabis garden. The cops said they were watching the pair since April. The plot of land was in the far back part of a lot owned by Prudential corporation. It was in an area that was closed off and hard to get to and not visible from the road. When they closed the net on these to wacky tobbacy growers they had 182 plant over 6 feet tall with a street value of $500,000! All of this is not all that funny but what really got me is that the two brothers were from my old town of Cranford and they were 51 and 53! Come on...let these guys go. It was probably for a little self medication or some extra cash since they can no longer work the cash-register at McDonald's.
I bet all that over time paid in surveillance and man power to fight the evils of pot were well paid. Because we all know that all those drunk drivers, wife beaters, muggers, terrorist and rapest were glad to know that all those cops were busy else where other than arresting the true evils of our towns. I also know that it is still illegal but I really don't think these two guys were going to blow themselves up at the UN building or put on black trench coats and kill a bunch of losers at a community college.
But oh well, its Friday and I am not in jail so all is right. Mr Grumpers has been keeping us up at night but that is all part of the game. And LoLo here is the answer to your question: Lucas.
One more shrieking induced pic for Becky......
Thursday, September 14, 2006
I have just gotten too lazy, being lazy is just too easy and I am falling into to it a little toooo much. And since I have an over active mouth glad I had better get on that running thing before I end up on the rolling thing.
At work we have a new facuilty manager and he is turning the place upside down and it is driving me crazy. I know what he is doing, he is the new guy and want to make a name for himself. But come on now, leave us alone! I know he is trying to make the wrongs right so I am not blasting the guy, there are alot of things that really need fixed and he probably will be the guy to do it but he is still driving me boonkers. But then again it has been about 5 years since our last real shake down in the company, so it was bound to happen.
I took my toy for its first oil change yesterday at our local Toyota certified auto dealer fixer person. And while I was there the evening news was playing, and two topics of interest kept me entertained. First topic: 'Why do auto dealers have there fixit place so far from their show rooms?' I really never thought about that, mine is only a few blocks away, hell its in walking distance for a crippled leperd with a missing foot but then again why the distance? The talkiing head on the idiot box said it was to keep the bad noise away from potential buyers. They thought if the garage was too close to the show room the lemons they sold would really come back to haunt them. I must say that is great marketing, and true. Even if a dealer is the most honest and trust worthy guy in the world(which is harder to find than a diamon ring in a CrackerJack box) he really has no control over the quality of the cars he gets from Ford/Honda/Toyota or wherever. He doesnt test out each car he gets, he just sells them as fast as he can to get rid of that over head. So that little rant form the talking head was not that big of a deal or a problem in my eyes.
Second topic: 'Shooitngs in Canada' there was a shooting at a community college up in Fake France Montreal. The stories were varied, from multipal shooters wear a black trench coat to a lone gun man that killed himself; one dead 20 injured to 4 dead and 12 hurt. This morning I heard it was one guy with a mohawk, black trench coat and an automatic rifle that died in a hail of bullets from the police. I find the fashion report a little werid, would they have mentioned his lack of oringalality (very Taxi Driver-sih) if he was wearing a pink IZod golf shirt with a pair of Old Navy cargo pants sporting some white canvas Bass lounge shoes topped of with a pair of DKNY sunglasses. It seems to me that they are always trying to blame their cloths for what and why they did what they did. They will probably put a ban on black tench coats soon, but mind you if he was wearing a tan London Fog all weather coat no one would have even mentioned it. And his hair style was a bit radical but why mention it on the evening news. If it had been a Brooklyn with a side fade would the news lady with too much eye shadow said anything about it? I could see his head being relavent if he had a shaved head with tats that read 'Killem All' with skulls everywhere, then I could see his choice of head wear being an issue. I blame France for this, they should have banned students from the schools, no students no violence-problem solved.
Now here is my not so naked pic, and yes the baby is in it. This was taken only minutes before we got to go home. We are all doing well, mommy is even back to school. She is trying hard as hell to get these last credits so she can get out into a better job. I am not in skool at the moment, I am a little broke and cannt get any aide from our rich nation that sees spending millions on anything and everything but on getting a white guy some edumakaion.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
“So , where are we now in this war? If this were a classical style war the USA would have no difficulty showing that it had scored a spectacular victory. It has succeeded in overthrowing 2 hostile regimes, and forced several other states in the region to stop sheltering and financing the gahzis (holy raiders). Territory the size of western Europe has been freed from 2 of the most vicious regimes in recent history”-Amir Taheri
-Their own people have turned on them for fuck sakes- Bara’a is the word used the means basically exoneration or the process of disowning the al Qaeda. Even the people around them want nothing to do with them and some of their religious leaders have even gone as far as declaring al Qaeda and its groupies heretics-which in their world is about the equivalent to excommunicatus in the roming catolik faith.
The author makes the point that this is not a war with traditional markers as what we won but more of a war on human freedom. And that no matter how long this war takes the enemies of freedom can not win. We are not fighting a war that has a set of rules like in the old board game RISK but more like a battle of who can hold out the longest. I feel that once all of their outside support goes straight to hell their resources will be reduced to there usual ways of dealing with things: Throwing rocks at tanks made of steal and running. There sure isn’t a shortage of rocks so maybe there is hope for them……..naw, I just hope all of our GI’s aim high. I we don’t want prisoners of war here, the only good terrorist is a dead one.
There I did it, a political post on how I feel about the war. We are winning the good fight and yes when my children are old enough I will encourage them to do what I only dreamed of (and still might do, I still have a few more year before I am considered 'Too Old'). I am still thinking about joining, the one thing that is keeping me is my 3 boys and my one wife-I am working on trying to get the wife unit to agree to more wives but I dont think it will work ;-) It seems to work in that show about that dude with 3 wives haha. I am just kidding on the mutlipale wife thing, you have to be insane to want to live with more than one woman at a time. That is just a recipe for death my friends.
And as promised my one baby pic of the day. He doesnt really fit in this thing but they dont make them any smaller. And from the looks of things he will be filling things out soon. He is already gaining weight, he went to the doctor yesterday and he said he is on the up and up.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
She was having very painfull contractions all night so at 0500 Thursday morning we headed over to the hospital. We got in the room about 0520 and gave birth at 1015, now that must be some kind of record I think lol.
My wife did a great job and was such a great pusher....umm...yeah I am going to go with it. She did 4 set of 3 pushes at 10 seconds each. Soooo that equal about 120 seconds of pushing in all to pop out baby #2, and yes if I failed to mention it, I is a boy!
I took a shit load of pics most of which I am not about to post because they are rather nasty, I am sorry but birth is a rather gooey process, that is putting it nicely haha. So here are some of the pics that will make most ppl go "Ohhhh" and "Ahhhh" instead of " Oh that is just nasty" and " Wow, after that I am thinking about adopting"
Mommy and baby..
Daddy and baby..
(Ben Affleck's double came in for a pose haha)
And baby, he scratched himself a bit. He was born with some pointed nials, I hope that is not some kind of prelude to a life of fashion and makeup. But hey if it worked for Dee Snyder it can work for anyone.
I have some more but blogger is being a bitch at the moment and this is precious time I could be sleeping haha. So I will try again later to upload more. There will be more, you have been warned!
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
So in that end we are still on the same course, but the reason for my blog today is this: I have a Hater! I am soo excited I am giddy with happiness. I thought about just leaving it as is, no one would ever see it because they commented on an old post that no one will probably never go back to read. August 10, 2006 -----
Anonymous said "your hausband is white trash ". Now why I find this even funnier than white people dancing is their wordage. 'Your hausband is white trash' hmmmmm well since I dont have a husband and this blog belongs to me and not my wife I think they ment to write'You are white trash' or maybe something like,'Your wife must be proud that she mairred such a trailer trash peice of shit' I mean come on. That is the worst comment 'your hausband is white trash' come on get creative here, hell I was born in TX, lived in AL, moved to LA, but migrated to NJ. So yes I have lived in a trail park more than once and I still see nothing wrong with living in one. Its just my wife doesnt want to live in one. My aunt lives in a nice double wide down in AL on a nice plot of land. More than I have here in the great north.
I know that by mentioning this dee dee dee ( if you dont know what a deedeedee is go hereDeeDeeDee) I have only give this faceless coward a soap box but I had to say it. I have a few ideas on who might have done it and since I have a counter on my blog I probably coould find them. But I have no desire to go through that much trouble to see what moron left a comment.
But after goggling what little info I got from my blog I found a picture of the brave commenter:
Friday, September 01, 2006
Now for something completely different: Doug is up for a week from the Navy! At the moment he is sleeping...all that navy poon and navy drinking can really do a man in haha. Unfortunatley I cannt go drinking with him, I have to stay sober until we have the new mouth to feed out in the open. Once that event unfolds itself I will be in the clear as far as booze in the body goes but till then i will be on the dry wagon looking for the nearest and softest place to jump off.
Its Firday and it has been while since I did a 'Friday Funny' so let me break back into it with this Friday dedicated to a body part that has everyones attention....'ASS!'
1) Why not to sleep naked....I do but for now on I will keep my new boxers near by.
2) I have heard of team work but that has got to be the shittiest job in this sport.
3) I love club sluts, if it were not for low self esteem and lack of daddies love we would not have girls like this....nor would Girls Gone Wild have ever come to light. What a loss that would be!
4) I am not sure what happened here but I have had a few skating moment like this. But my ass is alot smaller and has more hair haha.
5) I am always on the look out for picture oppurtunites like this but I never find them myslef.
6) The 'hole' reason to be a doctor.
I hope yall got a giggle out of my newest Firday Funny, have a great holiday weekend. I will be at work on Monday if we do not go into labor sometime today. Have a good one!