Well....actually a funny thing happened on the way to work. I was running late to work this morning so I was breaking every law know to the state of NJ. I cut through a prak to cut some time off of my commute and then I saw them. Two squirrels about 2 blocks away in the middle of the road. I was cumming up to them and one of them took off like any animal with sense would. I was about a block away from this one rat with a fuzzy tail but he wasnt moving, hell he got up on all fours and look right at me. And what I saw in his eyes was desperation, I saw that the other rodent was the love of his life and he was just told that she has been digging another dudes nuts. And that as of today they were through! He saw me as his way out of this loveless world.
Now I was not about to swirve and slam into a tree or on cumming traffic but I did move so that he would just go under my car with no problem. But the momment I was going to pass over him, he took the lovers leap ....alone. The car went ' Bump' and it was all over. If I wasnt in such a rush I would have stopped and took some pics for the CSI crime lab. It was a hit and run after all.
I felt bad and was not looking forward to cleaning my wheels, which I never even looked at lol. But ever seen that car insurance commercial with the 2 squirrels that get some guy in a car to crash? I could not help but think of them as I drove on. And again I was laughing my ass off as I drove into work. :-D I beat them at their own game! They are probably working for AllState or something, the momment you crashed they would run over and give you a card for insurance and body work then run off. So fuckem, I wont swirve for anything smaller than an shit-sue dog!
I will probably blog some more later on Saturday....work is a mess and I am not even going to re read what I wrote....I am off tho the races....another double but at another site.
13 comments:
Poor little guy. At least you tried. I don't think many ppl would. I usually honk at them. It's funny, because people start looking all around, in a panic.
A squirrel is dead, and yet this post is entirely entertaining. Not as entertaining as that other recent Friday post *ahem* but...
Murderer!
I'm unfaltering on my attack on pigeons with my car. Hate the bastards. Squirrels are cute though. As long as they don't have rabies.
You were cumming up on the squirrels? Was that a Freudian slip? Or are you letting us in on your kinky side? 8-)
We have black squirrels, which has raised the question...if it's bad luck when a black cat crosses your path is it good luck when it's a black squirrel?
martini: thanks, yeah this friday was a bit hurried I will try better for the up cumming one.
becky: would it make u feel better if I were to stop and scoop it up and eaten it....i was thinking about it....
tortoise: ;-) thanks
Hammy: I have yet to get a bird, you must have slow pigeos out there....the ones out here are to fast to get with a car.
kilroy: Kinky with a fuzzy, soft woodland creature....I have no idea what u are talking about hahhaha.
And as far as the bad luck part, its only bad ,luck if u try to aviod them and hit a tree instead.
I always carry a hotplate in my car, so when I hit a delicious lesser animal I can cook them right on the spot.
I just can't get over the fact that I came to your blog and didn't see any breasts in my face, wow!!! Are you ill or something?
Yeah, I had a typo in the first comment because I was so amazed! =P
pHIL THE SQUIRREL KILLA
morbid: let nothing go to waist!
cinderall: No I feel fine, but boobies are always on my mind :-D
Lisa: :-D yeppers
Only for community feelingstoopid.blogspot.com! HOT!
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