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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Monday, May 01, 2006

Kill me its Monday....

Well I guess I should have exspected this Monday to extra nasty due to the fact that the weekend was a good one. Saturday the wife unit had to work in the moring so I slept in a bit, score one for me lol. We then went to this birthday part for one of her cowork's daughter. She was turning one so they through her a little party at some Knights of Columbus hall in Rahway NJ. They had food, booze and a clown. What more could a girl ask for haha!



As one can see it was a pretty princess theme party...what a way to give a child a complex at such an early age lol.



As I said they had a bar, beer and whine was free to guest. I bought 2 gin and tonics and got a pitcher of beer and soda for our table. Well, it seems I was the only beer drinker at my table....u shall see soon enuff.



Here we have the clown doing his thing. I think I was a little to drunk to really follow but the magic tricks he was doing was blowing my alcoholed drowned mind to bits. Here we have the little woman on the far left and the wee man on the bottom. Notice him in the "going away from clown" angle. He was not scared of him but he was not too thrilled to be near him either.



Whenever my son sees a little girl he is all over them. Here we see what happens when he actually catchs one of them. I was no better when I was a wee lad, I chased them through hell and high water. I had no idea what to do with them once I got them but I knew I wanted it, so yeah my mom was pretty sure I wasnt gay from the beginning lol.



As I said earlier I was the only beer drinker at my table so who was I to waist any? It would have been thrown away and that was not happening on my watch! I was feeling rather sauced up by the time we left, thanks birthday girl!



One last look at the clown.......I swear he possed those kids, and now I have the proof!

Now from here I was feeling all tosty so we decided to take a little hike over to the mall. I love going to the mall drunk haha. Did I mention that the end of this month is when I will be posting my findings on the photo scavanger hunt? And the mall is a great place to find lots of the things on the list. If you dont know what I am talking about scroll down my side bar.........for some reason it has moved on me and I dont feel like going about and fixing as of yet.....and click on the red "Photo Scavanger hunt" button.



This isnt on the list of things to find but I got a real kick out of it. I am probably going to go back and buy this for my bro in law, he loves hot sauces. I like them too but he has a much higher threshold than I do. Lets see how he holds his own agaist Blair's!

Drum roll and go to the ER free card please...............



Now as this pictures shows, I am now in posession of one of the greatest man toys ever made. Yes folks you heard it here first, I know own a chain saw! It is my birthday/fathers day present. It is a bit early for both of them, I am still 29 damn it, but I had to have this one. I found it at home depo but the moment I saw it I had to have it. It was not the manliest of colors but it had my name allllll over it. It looks like the one I had when I was a kid that had the ball chain that rotated like a real one and even vibrated when u pulled the string. I am man with a stylish man toy.....I am sooo Fab-bu-lous right now I could just fart! I have yet to used becasue by the time I was done with all of the other outside chores I did on Sunday I was just to pooped to try it out. BUT........next weekend is supposed to be a nice one as well. I have the band-aides and neosporan ready and waiting for this adventure hahahaahhaha.

Now before I go and hit the hay, because today has been a hell of a Monday and this week looks realllly bad I thought I would leave yall off with a little thing I call A Moment Of Zen:

( Yeah we all know that what we all say on MySpace)

15 comments:

Cherry! said...

Those kids really do look possessed!!

Steph said...

Strolling through the mall half buzzed is one of my favorite things to do!

honkeie said...

cherry- did u know a serial killer was once a clown for kids birthdays????
steph- I usually go to Target after getting lit like a firecracker....fun times
the_mrs- I will get drunk anywhere there is booze, exspecally if its free!
And my wife has, she can be soo silly at times. I plan on using it to trim the bushes and cut the grass this weekend!

The Hatleyman said...

Dude, anytime you have a pink doll house on your blog - you must seek tequuilla shots ASAP.

GERBEN said...

OMG! A chainsaw?!? Really?!? Dude! Can I play with it???

Anonymous said...

ahha ur blog is damnfunny man!

i like the hand n mouce photo :P

honkeie said...

hatley: Pink is my favorite crayon, pink as the sheets that we lay on......guess who sings that?

norme: thanks, and I will put the fear of man into all trees near me lol.

kidd: you can touch it if you like lol


smash: thanks for da props :-D

honkeie said...

shanon: I like clowns, I love all scary things lol. She was fine he only wanted to show her how much he really like her lol. And thanks, have fun with the packing. Make it a game and have a few drinks while u work :-P

The Hatleyman said...

Ummmm....that's Aerosmith...and still me thinks: you = need a shot of tequilla...LOL

morbid misanthrope said...

Make sure you mix alcohol and playing with chainsaws. You'll have an increased likelihood of injury, but you'll be so sauced you won't feel it until after they've stitched you up.

Is that an Eye of Horus tattoo? Or is it an udjat eye? I’ll have to ask the poker dealer at the Luxor next time I’m in Vegas. He always says he doesn't know, but I think he's just keeping secrets from me...just like that sphinx in the gift shop.

honkeie said...

hatle: just line them up and watch me knock them down

the_mrs: tank u, it took me all day to get this damn thing right lol.

morbid: eye of horus is about right. I just call it my egyptian eye lol

Shari said...

Hey Honk!!!

Love how your little boy is around the girls!!! :)

HEY!! Someone else here is named Cherry?!! Just remember I was your first Cherry. haha

I'm not even supposed to be here today said...

Chain saw are not just for boys my friend! I distinctly remember the surge of power I felt when I bought my first chainsaw... everything in my path got hacked down. All excess foliage shriveled away and died when they saw me coming... lest the be hacked off at the knee. I think I was 29 when I bought my chainsaw, and I assure you we've had some good times together in these last four years! You didn't just purchase a tool, you purchased a beer-drinking buddy! Good buy!

Becky said...

"my internet cock is this big," LMAO! That's a good one!

Hammy said...

What does a suburbanite really need a chainsaw for? Making your own home movie?