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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Panhandlers....

I don't like to say I hate people that beg for money, hell I have give money to beggars all the time. But I will say I hate certain kinds of people that beg for money. If you want my money you had better have/be one of the following:


A) Have a great story to tell, like this one guy that flagged me down about running out of gas trying to get to the air port and his atm card wasnt work. I gave me 20$, it was all I had and the guy seemed desperate. He was either a great actor or really in a jam. He wasnt dirty, offered me his Movodo watch as collateral and was super polite. Now I know he could have been full of shit but a good sales men gets me every time!

B) Doing something that warrants payment. There is this old guy we used to see all the time in the parking lot of this little strip mall that housed a Blockbusters, Pizza Hut, Wacky Woo's Chinese and a Farmers Market produce store I used to give money to. And yes he would ask for change but he would also be out there with a broom and dust pan cleaning up the parking lot. I gave him beer money all the time.

C) Be big and scary. I used to go to this McDonald's that is right by my house but after this last panhandler I refuse to go. I have had numerous crack heads with all kinds of stories scurry out of the pj's ( that is right across the street from this place) like roaches out of a room after the lights were turned on, asking for money. But the last guy kinda spooked me a bit. He was this big, muscular black dude who said he just got out of the 'joint' and was having a hard time getting a job. And I understand where he was coming from and thanked him for asking for money instead of shanking me for it. And the funny thing is if he had of beaten me for it he would not have made off with any more than I had give him freely.

D) Look like you really need it! Some raggedy old guy with no shoes, smells like death and then some, a beard that would scare off ZZ Top and finger nails that have never seen a file will get money from me every time. Come on, a little beer money isnt going to save him but it might help through just one more night.

And I know giving money to them does not help them but I also know giving money to organizations that are supposed to help them, doesn't either. How many times have we read about the head of the Red Cross getting caught using the money for booze and hookers or the Chairman of the Salvation Army selling the cloths on the side for more money to feed his scratch off lotto habit? So what to do one might ask........well why would I begrudge a man the need for a beer when that was the very thing I was heading out of the house to buy anyway! Just be honest with me, and I know there are not alot of hobos out there that read blogs but if you are going to ask for money be honest.
Like these guys I found on the internet:

1) You had me at 'Hey you got a dollar'


2) I would have just went over and had a footeey withem!


3) I am on the look to find this man!




But the people I wont give money to is people that dont even try or they used gimmicks that just are annoying. The ones in question are these two that stand at the corner by the same McDonalds I mentioned before. They try to play off they are deaf and hand you these photo copied sheet of the ASL (american sign language) alphabet cards. I see this man and woman team hand off these sheets to each other as one shift ends and the other begins. But what makes me not want to give them beer money is the fact they dont even try, they sit there talking to each other and then run over and try to get you to give sympathy money because they are deaf. Yeah ok, not today maybe later.
But they have gotten me interested in learning how to curse in sign language. And for obvious reason haha! I found many learning tools thanks to youtube, and if you want you can look them up as well. I was going to link some of them but I am not in the mood to go through all of them. I will link one though, it is this guys ASL video of a Marylin Manson song, and being a big fan of his older stuff (not this recent limp wristed emo bullshit he has been putting out) I will link it. This Is the New Shit ; go check it out; I am Fill and I endorse this video!

Wow, was that a rant or what!?! I think I need a smoke after that one! WooT! But it is now time to get back to work and go take a nap in my car, it has been a long day so far, I started this post at 10:47 am and its now almost one! So let me wrap this up with a picture I took while running out the door today. I started to collect bottle caps one night I was out back drinking with the neighbors, not sure what i am going to do with them I just like the pretty colors.

4 comments:

Cough The Bot said...

Oh fuck me, we's first!

1... Why snooze in the car when there are perfectly good bars to lay your head on (once you've had a skinful)?

2... Bottle caps. Erm, how sad is that?

3... Thanks for visiting our place. Much appreciated and we hope you return!

4... We like you.

~Sheila~ said...

Bottle caps, huh? Now are you going to collect DIFFERENT caps or just walk around and pick up EVERY bottle cap you see on the ground?
How will you display them?

I love that first pic with the bum and the karate sign. Hilarious.

Becky said...

I gave a bum money a few months ago. He had a sign that said, "why lie? I need money for beer" I had to give a fiver to that!

honkeie said...

tazzy: I dont remeber visiting you but I will be sure to go back....all those bottles that were attached to those caps can some times make me forget how to pee straight.

sheile: I only keep the ones i drink, I am not sure what I am going to do with them but I will let you know when I do!

becky: see there is nothing wrong with being honest. Unless its is when you wife askes you that question of 'do you think of me when you fist pump the hog stick in the shower?'
Then I think lieing is more about survival than morals.