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About Me

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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

I like to curse.....

I do, sometimes I feel as though it is almost like a sport to me. And I do it without even thinking half the time, shit just slips out. I know using such language puts me down the socal ladder and that most people shy away from it, and you know what:

I really do not trust people that dont curse. We just got a new boss and he drops F-bombs almost every second! I still have some reserves about him because he is still new but that one thing makes me want to like him.

And I know some people just dont let words like that out but I know they want to. It is like asking your husband/boyfriend/dad what he is thinking about when a woman in a string bikini walks by on a warm summer day at the beach.
"Gee dear what are you thinking about?" She asks out of the corner of her mouth.
With a bead of sweat starting to form on his forhead he says," Isn't there a seafood shop near here that has steamed breaded clams for sale?"
Everyone has it in them but only the brave dare to blurt it out.

And I dont care who you are when kids curse it is the funniest fucking thing in the world! I know that we cannt allow our little drunken midgets to curse because of our society and that phone call we would get from the school. And yes I have had to correct mine recently, he has taken a shine to Dave Chappel's 'What Did the Five Fingers Say to the Face' song and the other one: Samuel L. Jackson song. Now the Samuel Jackson song it the best and to hear a five year old running around the house singing, 'Mm Bitch, MmBitch Bitch Bitch!' He was corrected and told not to say that and so far he has been pretty good, me on the other wife gives me the evil eye every time I start up with it. I am sorry its funny and I will find myself singing my favorite parts while washing dishes.....'Hows it taste motherfucker hows it taste....Hows it taste motherfucker hows it taste!?'

Part of this little blog came about this morning when my big boss was telling us about the time he had to go to sensitivity trainning for telling an off color joke a few years back when he was still a cop. A cop telling an off color joke!?! Really no fucking way! I am all for people not feeling uncomfortable in their work enviroment but when I have to check everything I say because I might offend someone with a good old fashion out burst of 'CockSuckingMotherfuckerTwatShitBastardCuntBreathAssholePeterPuffer!'
But these days we are faced with signs like this:

And This:

Nothing pisses me off more than being told I cannt do something as fundamentaly rightous as cursing. If I offended someone on my blog with my language then good, please leave a dirty comment and go away. The lunacy that is this cluster fuck of a policy has just gone wrong. I curse at work and no one cares, and it is never in a manner that would call someone out to make them feel bad. It is just a sentence enhancer, you can make a boring sentence spicey with just a splash of 'fuck' and a sprinkle of 'shit' (thank u sponge bob)! -And if you get that refernece we should hang out and drink beer until we vomit!
I can go on and on about this but I am getting bored with beating a dead horse, even though beating a dead horse would probably be alot more fun. Tits Tuesday and I need a day off all ready!


Carie said...

I cuss alot lol...product of being in a family of truckers, grew up at the shop, lol love those old men, they never watched their language, but were so damn sweet...the things they taught me to say got my mouth washed out frequently lol...
i still have a very bad mouth, but I do have to watch myself closely as I work with children daughter is alot like me, at 3 years old she told my brother to shut the fuck up and sit his stinky ass she got that from the truck stop lol, it was great, of course we had the talk, but it is so funny when they slip at that age lol...

~Sheila~ said...

I curse a lot too. I like to test people (except my clients cause I'm not trying to offend them and lose my job) but I meet new people all the time and will throw out a few test words like Damn or Shit and check their reaction.
I busted Dom cursing and posted it in one of my blogs (too lazy to find it) so now he is careful not to be cursing (around me anyway).
I know he does it though!

honkeie2 said...

Carie: Truck drivers fucking rule! They always have the best, 'It fell off the truck' goodies!

sheila: I like to drop real heavy prophanity on people I dont know to see if they flench.
like this one time I was at Starbucks and as usual it was full of these stuckup yuppie scum and I bumped into a display and shouted:
"Oh fucking shit Cum bag I almost dropped my phone, you dick tart!"
Man you would have thought I just shot up the place with a shotgun from the looks I got! ha

The Teenage Years said...

That pic is hilarious ///// the one of uncle sam its super funny