Even at home I do not troll as much smut as i used to. I don't even have time to show my trouser snake who's the boss anymore. It also doesnt help that the computer is in the living room. Having a tug of war with my ham wallet during family tv time isnt really exceptable behavior in any society.
But in honor of my duties I went and looked up 'DooDie' to show my love of work....
1) My new slogan!
2) I love white teeshirts....
3) He is one doodie dont mess!
I missed making note of what happened to me this weekend. Now I learned somthing about what to do before something to get your self ready. If you watch the workout channel before hitting the gym the workouts become better. Watch a movie about boxing and you suddenly become a boxer, not a very good one but a boxer never the less. You look at a little porn before running over to your girls place for a booty call and you might set her cooter on fire from friction.
Now all of these are good ideas, but I made a little booboo in this area. We went to a birthday party on Saturday and I have been watching Beer Fest for the past few days ....so to say the least I was psyched about drinking.
Great ass movie, if you like drinking. But like I said I was totaly pumped to pound them down. I was putting them away with gusto that would have scared an Irishman on a bender. Nothing bad happened, my pants stayed on the whole night, I talked anyones ear off that would listen and the wife was a little pissed about me being pissed.
I dont know, I get around beer and I become a fucking gold fish. i wont stop until its gone or I am gone. I did not vomit or break anything but my slurring and babbling was a bit over whelming even for me. But all was good, I did not even have a hang over. I dont get them often, lucky me.
But this proves how suggestable I am, show me titties I get a boner, show me beer I get a boner, show me a flower I get a boner. Men are the simpelest creatures on the planet.
I know its still Tuesday but dog only knows when i will be on next, so have a Happy Hump Day. The weekend will be here before you know it!
11 comments:
Ham wallet? Genius! I've never heard that one before. I must be slipping in my old age.
Cherish the drinking, dude. I had to watch Beerfest sober. My internal organs are such quitters.
Hmm. Drunk men get boners. Very interesting.
morbid: it always sucks when our organs cannt keep up with us.
phishez: When I get drunk I am nothing but a walking boner hah.
Beerfest was a decent movie! Drunk boners are the best! That sucks that you can;t puruse the porn while the children watch TV...terribley depressing!
jenny: I perfer sober boners. Drunk sex just gones on forever and when the momment of truth comes...BamB nothing, I know it happened but i did not feel anything. drunken orgazims arent for me lol.
I"ve heard that as well - that when the guy is drunk he can go on for ages but the orgasm bit isn't anything.
Ham wallet? Nice! very classy :)
I read about a guy that called his wife's labia her 'meat curtains'.
what IS IT with processed meats and genitals?
Well your not a female!
betty: men like to name things with manly undertones. And there is nothing more manly than MEAT! And yes I have heard of meat curtains before, I have also heard it refured to as rare roast beef.
jenny: No I am not but I can do a great Silence of the Lambs man-gina haha
I have to disagree with drunk men getting boners. Mostly they tell me they luff me, burp, fall over and fall asleep :D
someday I will have to get drunk just to know what its like lol...and Ken is like you, everything makes hima a happy man lol
samantha: alcohol does usually put me to sleep but once the beast from below awakes its all over!
carie: you are a drunkard virgin...ohhhh to many nasty thoughts to list lol
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