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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

Missing In Action.....

I have been missing in action due to school, yes I said school. I am currently doing the online thing so 90% of my computer time has now been taken up by it. I am using The University of Phoenix 'Distant Learning' program. When I have my degree I will be an alumni of the school even though I have never been anywhere near Phoenix. When I get my batchelors I will probably fly out there to do the whole cap and gown thing......hell why not? The classroom basicly works like a message board. The teach post, you post and the other students post. All assignments are done this way. The only problem with doing school this way is that you have to be on top of things yourself. There is not someone there looking at you asking you to do your work. All the resonsibility of doing the work and handing it in on time is all up to you. I am not much of a self starter but this class is kinda making me one. I have to download the sylibus, the calander and all the assignments and it is up to me to do it all. All the teacher does is post the info and read what you summit. It is a little strange but it also great, I can log in at anytime and anywhere. I have been keeping up with all the assignments so far, lets see how this trip turns out. I really have high hopes for this endevor, I am hoping this one works out better than I hoped.

Now, as I mentioned last week we had to go out and get a new bed for the little men in our lives. I took a few pics as we put this thing up. And I must say this was one of the easiest pieces of furntarure I have ever done......TO HELL WITH IKEA! Do not ever buy that fiber board shit! The directions are horrible and the material they use has to be the worst ever. Wood dust pressed with glue, fasteners made from low grade zinc and instructions that give you panic attacks just from looking at them.

1) Here we laid out the large boards first to see how to go from here.

2) The wife unit lending a hand.....well actually she usually puts all of our stuff together. I really suck at doing this type of stuff.

3) Made in the land of waxed cooters and the smallest bikini's known to man.

4) The only draw back to this was you needed a good bit of elbow greese to get some parts to work. Its all in the fore arms ppl!

5) To make things even easier for retards like me they put these little stickers on the planks that corresponded with the instructions. What a genius idea.....are you listening IKEA!?!

6) Another stroke of genius was they put all the little screws and dowels in their own little baggies and used a letter system to tell you what went where. IKEA would just give you a big bag with everything mixed up. Take notes IKEA, I know the Swiss air is thinner and all that pot makes you stupid but this is sooo simple even a stoner could do it.

7) Now since I am only good for lifting and looking sexy the thinking part was left to the wife unit.

8) Almost done.....

9) I forgot to take a picture of the finished project and with my mind all over the place these days all I have is a picture of the box and what it should look like. And yes it does look just like the box, I will have to post a real picture soon.

I am now off to go back to school while sitting at my office. I just thought of something, I can go to class drunk, naked, in bed and or while on vacation.......this is tooooo cool!


Reba said...

I am usually the one that puts the stuff together for Munchkin too. I always get made fun of because I read and use the directions.

prunella jones said...

Your online school sounds pretty cool. Maybe if I'd done that instead of partying so much it wouldn't have taken me six years to get my BA.

Nikky said...

I have wondered about the U of Phoenix, but I don't think I have the willpower that you seem to. I need that 'show up to class and hand in homework' pressure!
The bunks look great, on the box... I'm sure you and the wife did a great job. I'm considering something of that nature for my youngest hoodlum here... how long did it take you two to assemble the whole thing??

Carie said...

Sounds like you are really liking the school thing :) thats good...

the beds look cute...Ash has what they call a dorm bed...its like a bunk bed but without a bed under it has a desk and book cases...bad side for her is she wakes up all freaked and bangs her head everytime lol

Martini said...

"To Hell With Ikea" Amen to that. One of these days I still plan on blogging about my Ikea nightmare. After they bent me over a barrel and spread my legs, then laughed while doing it, I made the decision to never buy from them again. And I've only caved in once or twice since then.

honkeie2 said...

reba: I have made the mistake enough times to know to always use the directions.

jones: Yeah I think if I had done the traditional way I would probably still be attached to the beer bong.

nikky:It took about 45 minutes with 2 ppl working on it.

carie: I have seen those beds, and I am sorry but I spit on myself laughing from the visiuals of your daughter doing this! You so need to get that on film!

martini: we all need to go all guerrelle warfare on Ikea!

Scottsdale Girl said...

Dude - Do NOT come to Phoenix if it is between April and NOvember, you will melt.