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About Me

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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Hell has no furry like a woman with her tit in a wringer

What that title has to do with....hell if I know but I would die laughing if someone got their tit caught in a wringer. And if you are not familiar with what a 'wringer' is here is a visual aid:

Its an old way to wash your cloths, you put the wet cloths into the wringer and it....well wrings them out....duh! And I guess somewhere along the line some short top heavy woman who was doing laundry topless mistoke her tit for a shirt and tried to wring it out.
Now how I got on that topic I have no idea but then again it did envolve boobs so.....there you go. I missed my Monday post because of work. My job left me out high and dry so I fought back a little. Here is the story:
I am the supervisor at my site, my boss left 4 weeks ago and my company has yet to send a replacement. So for the time being we have had this replacement boss that is only an 'acting boss' I am not to hard on him because he has his areas to deal with now he has my old bosses area ass well. The old boss gave his two weeks and did everything by the book(even though he was a boob he wasnt too bad) but the office did not have anyone lined up to take his place.....and hell they still dont. And I cannt get the job because as per company policy: To make the move from where I am at I have to have a 4 year degree. I am working on it but it takes time and I had to take a few semesters off so that the little woman can finish. She is alot closer to her degree than I am and there is no way we can both go at the same time.
Now on Monday things came to a head, we have another post that has come open since Monday. They have known about this for 2 weeks and sent no one for trainning. All the ppl I have on my site that could help out are either working, at school, on other post or unavailable. Come Monday morning I get a call from the 'temp boss' around 0630 saying that we still dont have anyone. I am stuck juggling 3 post with 2 people. And yes I felt like I had my tit in a wringer here. By 0930 I was pissed to say the least, I called our big boss and asked of there was anything anyone could do. And you know what he said........
BigBoss: Why is this the first time I am hearing about this?
Me: I told 'temp boss' about this 2 weeks ago, I reminded him a week ago and then I reminded him again 3 days ago.
BigBoss: I should have been informed about this, these things cannt wait until the last minute!
Me: Um, I know that is why I was coresponding with the person I was told to speak to enregards to my site. I was never told to go to you with these things.
BigBoss: I will call you back.....
After this short conversation I got a call from another boss.....smaller than BigBoss, higher than me and about the same as my TempBoss. He told me that they were taking someone from another site and she will be there shortly........Fuck me running! One phone call and problem solved! Now in two weeks they could not have gotten her over there for proper training so that come Monday this would not have been an issue?
I know there is alot on TempBoss's plate but come on people, this is an open post that needed coverage. And fully knowing that there wasnt anyone to help us out come the day. I did not get to my computer once in that whole day, to do work or blog. I was not a happy camper damn it!
But tits over and I believe those envolved in the screw up had their asses chewed out for it, hey you dont want me to take the post because I have the exsperience but not the degree.....fine. But dont think for a second I am going to take on the responsiblity of the postition for the same pay. I know if I was incharage this would have worked out differently. And hell I used to have the post right before this company took over. I took a step down as far as positions are concerned but I got to keep the same pay. So there was no bitching in that area. But having no support and schmucks trying to blame you for their fuck ups.......well lets just say I always cover my ass in this company. It is company policy....CYA.....CoverYourAss. Document everything and leave nothing open for question.

Enough, enough of that foul talk. Lets go to a happier place where Mr.McFeely comes and plays with you at nap time and some strange purple dinosuarish creature wants to talk to you about how getting kicked in the nuts but the bully made you feel. I have a few pictures from the weekend to help put us all in a better mood. We will feel better after this,,,,,yes well will.
1) My oldest is on a basketball team......not the best buch of NBA hopefulls (to0 man honkeie's) They had there asses handed to them by the other team. And the funniest thing is that the star player on the other had to be the shortest one out of the bunch. But he had the best control on that ball out of everyone. My son......well lets just say he was having fun with it. I am not a big gun-whoe sports werido so I wasnt making a scene about it. You play, you have fun.....fuck the score.
He is the 3rd from the left.
2) Now here i might have advised him to punch the other kid in the back of the head but that old dude with the realllllly loud whistle might have tried to blow it at me. At me....blow it at me...not blow me.....damn you have a dirty mind! ;)
3) Cheese has his first tooth coming in and so begins the slobber fest and chew toys. He has not been to bad as of yet, but we do have the childrens Tylenol handy. When in dought.....drugem up!
4) Cheese and mommy. He has to be the smiliest baby I have ever seen. He just makes you smile right along with him.
5) Now........this picture needs a few words. It was taken on Monday at work, ssssshhhhh dont tell anyone. This comes from this nice spanish lady that has the dress of a 20 some, the body of a 20 some but the face of a 50 some. From the neck down you would swear she was a hot spanish mommie, but the face tells a whole nother story. And that story might be titled 'Once Apon a Time in Columbia When My Face Was Tighter You Would Have Been begged Me to Put It In My Mouth' But time is cruel and wrinkles suck. All the guys give her credit for keeping the body in good working order and also agreed on the total number of beers that would make her a possibility: 8, and on an empty stomache.

At least its Camel Toe and not Buffalo Knuckle!
It is Tuesday........And I have more news to drop but it will have to wait for another day. I have a pile of paper work waiting for me. I am using it as an elbow rest while I type up this post. Pretty comfy, the "IN" box finally has a real purpose.


Chrissy said...

Two words. Teething Tablets. Go to your local drugstore (cvs, eckerd, walgreens, etc.) They will save your sanity when cheese starts getting cranky over the teething. They are homeopathic and work great. I used to put them in a little spoon and dissolve them with water. Also works if adults have a toothache. place one on the sore tooth and pain goes away. Good luck

Chrissy said...

oh by the way,

OUCH! thanks for the visual.

honkeie2 said...

WOOOOOOOO thanks,,,,I will have to go get them....Teething tit!

morbid misanthrope said...

I really don't know why, but I want to put a hot pocket through a wringer ... and maybe a cat, too.

prettykitty said...

man, that was one long post. i had to stop and take a breather before finishing it. still it was very entertaining. and that camel toe is more like a moose knuckle. what is she making bread in those jeans?

SassyAssy said...

Cheese is sooooooooo adorable! Truly!

Well, my mantra at the office is "You need to go ask ________". Those sobs can barely wipe their asses and yet, they can't tolerate a take charge I just send a huge line of coworkers to them...(insert evil laughter). Good luck on the degree!

Nikky said...

I always let my little monkeys chew frozen waffles when they were teething... messy, yeah, but it worked! the Cheese is one cute bugger!
Don't you just love kids playing sports at that age, it's more about having fun for them, winning is secondary. My daughter's hockey team is the same way.
As for the camel toe chick... sad to say, but just the description reminded me of my mom. That skinny little bitch wears a size 4 jeans, and would be a great candidate for your tits friday, but wow, the wrinkles are a bitch...she turned 55 this past fall.
Long response to a long post, I guess...Sorry, I'm done now!

Carie said...

OUCH!!!! lol but funny

prunella jones said...

Sounds like you've got the best of both worlds. The high pay but someone else is responsible. "Don't know man, not my job."

Cheese is a total Gerber baby. Get that kid in commercials.

My mom looks like that in jeans. She's always getting the wolf whistles when she's walking down the street. I can only hope I'll look that good at 60.

Miss 1999 said...

Ok, I would've told Big Boss to bite me-- but you know, I'm just that kind of person *LOL*

Anyway, loved the pics, of the kids and wife that is-- the camel toe is just too much *LOL*

Hammy said...

Buffalo knuckle - now there's a term I would like to use in everyday conversation.

honkeie2 said...

morbid: a cat might be a little more interseting than a hotpocket lol

kitty: makin bread hahahahaha....well yeast does rise!

sassy: I think I will use that line today.

nikky: make them as long as u want I will read. Frozen waffles and to love it.

carie: just because it hurts doesnt mean it cannt be fun lol

Jones: so your mom looks good in jeans huh? Maybe you could give us a little show....and we could pick who has the better bottom half LOL

miss: there can never be enough camel toe in a post.

hammy: do it.....hell I want you to end every conversation with that word.
'Yes go down two block and the post office will be on the right.......buffalo knuckle.'