Friday fun

What an interesting Friday i have had. I am not sure if i mentioned it but i am in the security field, u know chasing skaters,salesmen, Mormons, and geese away.
Anywhooo today i have had my hands full with some of the fun things that cum along with my brass made of plastic( and no i am not a mall cop lol). For starters we had a butt fire in one the dildo shaped smokers bin we have out in the front of our building. Funny thing, it did not take much to put it out and the people reporting it just walked by it laughing. Yeah it would be even funnier if it caught on fire and someone got burnt. i would start rollin on the floor if one of these suites caught on fire from the damn cigars they smoke. Trying to impress everyone by leaving the ring on it while they are smoking it. Yeah buddy i look soooo cool smoking that Cohiba there, but boy do u smell like a dirty ass afterwards; here is a hint - its called a smokers jacket lol. Anyway, as u can tell i am no fan of corporate retards. With a little bit of hope their lifestyles have made them sterile. lol. These are the kinda people who point out problems but never give any useful input on how to fix it. Then they feel so proud they did something for once they want to tell everyone that will listen, "yeah i save someone today, i saw a car acciedent and call 911......did i stay and help?.....no, it caught fire and i might have gotten hurt, or worse,,,been late for work! I just told the operator where it was and she thanked me and hung up. Man if feel like a million today, maybe i should volunteer to help people or something......What, u dont get paid.....bump that ...hehehehe i have done my good deed for my life time." That is probably a typical conversation at the water cooler in the world of thin wrist cubical dwellers.
Got to love them, easy targets, u can spot them a mile away by the downward glance, ipod, backpack or crappy brief case, and usually walk ten two.(pigeon toed). such easy pickings, hell i bet they have never had to ran for thier lives. and i think it is our duty to help them out and get back into the real gene pool. next time u see one point at him/her and scream in your loudest voice," It is your day to die!!!!!!!" ( make sure they know u are addressing them) and chase them around the subway, park or where ever u see one. Dont actually do anything too painful or irreversible but put the fear back into their lives. Without the threat of death what is the point of living; we will give them something worth talking about around the cooler the next day. if u can i would advise video taping it and getting a bunch together and call it "geek-er-sice" how to get that weak pulse up in 5 seconds flat. one could make millions on this lol, hell id pay to see it lol. these ppl have been terrorized their whole teenage lives, lets bring back the fun they had then to the now. wedgies, swirlies, dog shit under their car door handles. they loved the abuse then soo lets keep the geek world happy, scare a geek today!
Wow that was a bit of a rant but oh well that is what i am here to do. Most ppl tell me to go away when ever i start a rant but here one can do this allllll day. Honestly not sure if anyone reads it but as long as one person does and gets a giggle its alll good.
But again on my job......we got to chase a salesman away today. He was taking pictures of our facility without permission and we had to chase his ass down. To bad we do not have any kinda weapons, Nothing lethal, but something make him never forget this day. Dont mess with flash light cops they are underpaid, pissed off, divorced, broke and not in the mood to deal with some shit head giving him an attitude about where not to park. Not a good idea in my book, once u have lost everything u are now free to do anything....think about that the next time u flip off some dude for cutting u off hehehehee. me personally i got plenty to lose and will not mess with ppl but u get someone who got nothin......your face may resemble your ass soo.