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About Me

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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Friday, November 06, 2009

Killing me slowly, thanks college.....

Once again school has taken over just about all aspects of my life. I dont blog, I dont exercise, I dont play video games and I dont think. If anyone says that they like college then they must have a trust fund back home and have no stress of the real world. The wife tells me I am not to let the kids hear my thoughts on college until they are in college, which is fine by me. No one told me so why should I tell them.
And hell I wish I had gotten this over with years ago! My advise to them will be just to do it so you wont have it hanging over your head later on in life when you really do not have the time or energy to deal with it. So far, I have to do 2 papers, a excel project, a power point project, a test on Tuesday and about 6 chapters of pc work to finish. And I have not even been to math class yet!
So far I see college as $40,000 worth of busy work. Yes I can type out papers and get decent grades on them, yes I can read stories and regurgitate them, yes I can follow a step by step process work sheet.....but does that make me ready for any real world job other than being a college professor...nope. Now if I was in nursing school I would be learning things about a job in real time, but a degree in business consist of hours upon hours of nothing but busy work. I guess it is getting you prepared for all the soul crushing work in the corporate world. Pointless presentations that take weeks to put together and then the meeting is canceled and the project gets shelved.
Sooooo I guess they are really doing those who have not yet worked in the field a favor. Get ready to work hard for hardly any return. But with that it has also taught me not to go all out on everything. I am not looking to be the top dog in my school or to give a speech at my graduation, I just want to pass and get that little roll of paper that says I am now a college graduate.
Now fuck off I have to go to work to pay off this hug loan that I amassed trying to get this degree so i could get a better job, with better pay so I would have the ability to pay off said loan.
Man is that depressing or what!
The papers I hand in reflect on this idea but they still seem to come back with A's and B's on them. But the next two I am not so sure about, I really am bullshiting my way through them. The semester is coming to a close and I am already sick of it all. Another 2 years of this, Obama-God help me! At this point I am not even sure I want to bother with the whole cap and gown, just mail me my diploma, my ring and fuck off. I do not have any ties to this school other than that loan I have to pay back, I do not go to any of the events they have, could care less about any of the sports they play in and have yet to see a frat party....its a dry campus. How gay is that?!?! There isnt even a bar on campus! The nearest bar is 3 blocks once you get off campus, which really isnt that big of a deal but still.....no frat parties!
I dont know, maybe its just me but all the hype about college seems lost on me. I think it is because I am here with the soul purpose of just getting it over with, not the whole first time away from home living on my own, with bright fresh young eyes. I used to think of myself as the glass is half full kind of a person, and still do at times, but I am not so sure any more. I have become very cynical, and I dont like it. Hell all I came here to do was post some pictures and run away and this whole notion of college got me into this long winded rant about my hate for the establishment! And I know most people will have all kinds of nose about how college is this or how college is that.....but in all I could careless what others think about it. I have seen how teachers make you buy a $300 book then never us it, being forced to pay for this fee and that fee even though I will never use the service, having to pat my head rub my tummy and god forbid if i forget on step I will be fined for it. The money trail is so obviously full of dirty deeds of greed and corruption I dont even have to point it out. When was the last time you heard of tuition going down? They keep jacking up the price but I do not see anything on the students end getting anything more out of it...
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And now I take a cleansing breath and say fuck you college I will win in the end and after all is said and done I hope to never go back.

Now on to some pictures that have been waiting to get here:

1) The wife had been gone for almost 2 weeks and came back on Halloween. I had to drive to JFK to get her with the boys. I hate driving out there, its always a nightmare. But it was well worth it all to have her home again.


2) And of course I was taking pictures of all I saw. The lady in the grey dress caught my attention. For one you could tell she was either wearing a tiny tiny thong or no panties at all and two she had to be at least in her 50's. But from the back she was in her 20's hahaha!


3) And here we have the very reason we got up that morning! She's finally home! And please dont ever go away again!


4) As I mentioned she came home on Halloween so later on that day we all went out trick or treating. Seth was a Glad-he-ate-her and Lucas was Tigger but he threw such a fit about wearing it we just put on his Pj's and went out.


5) This house does the every year, freakin awesome.


6) These were our decorations.


7) Since we go out we leave a bag of candy and a note. It helps to ensure all candy is take lol, save me from myself


8) These guys were driving around giving candy to kids. I thought they were going to throw eggs at us at first but turned out they were nice guys. Sometimes you just never know!


9) And if you think college isnt driving me to drink you are wrong.....oh so wrong......coffee that is!


9) But even with all that coffee at some point this will happen......

So that is it for my pointless rant about nothing and everything. Have a great weekend I am going to try for one post a week until I have more time and energy to do more. I think I need to keep a blogging journal, so that I can remember what it was I came to the keyboard to bitch about ha! Half the time I come on here I forgot why I came here, note taking is a must for me in remembering anything lol.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Bad me take....god if I know....

I have been slacking in everything these days. School, work, home and even the internet. The wife has been gone for a week now, she went down to Uruguay with her dad. His mom is not doing to well and was in the hospital. They sent her home a few days ago, the doctors told them there isn't anything else they can do for her. It is time to go home and get some rest. And we all know what that means. But it is for the better, it better to be home in the end than in an unfamiliar place when the time comes. I am not good with words at times like this, I just hope everyone down there is doing well.

With the wife gone it has been me and the kids. I have had the help of Sharon and Alan with getting the kids off in the morning and watching them while I am in school but that really isnt a substitute for my wife unit. It strange, I have been away from the family and the wife before but I have never missed her soo much. It is just so strange coming home to no one.

And I know I am not the first person on the planet to be separated from a spouse but its new to me. She will be home this Saturday, so I think this Halloween will be spent holding and hugging the family.

And with her gone I have even more stress than before, I never had to deal with stress like this. Again this is new to me, this new found feeling of being over whelmed and I dont like it. I have no energy or desire to do much of anything. I used to have so much get up and go I swore I had speed in my veins. But now that well of energy has gone dry. Even doing this post I have to drag it out of me. I know I always jump from one idea to another but here it seems more obvious because I just want to be done with it.

I love keeping a life journal, and I even recently bought a new one. I am forcing myself to keep it up because I know down the road when all of this is done I will thank myself for it. I started my last journal 12/08/2004 and ended it 10/25/2009, almost 5 years of my life put into a nice little book. Someday I will go back and read it and laugh at all the things I did.





I also like to add little parts of my life and world in it. On the first page of the old one we have some funny articles, a band aide from one of Lucas's doctor visits, my Feed Me card from the all you can eat Rio22, and a receipt for something.....I am not sure what it is but I think it might be for that 'adult' novelty store I went to some years back. Are you a freak like me?



But in my loneliness I do have one adult comfort to help me along, good old Sailor Jerry. But he does have one draw back, spend too much time with him and he will have you bawling like a baby in your drink wishing your sweet peas was home. Alcohol has a odd effect on me when I get all emotional.




But I have to run, way to much to do and I dont even know where to start. School work I DONT want to do and work at work I HAVE to do. Oh well, its time to put on the big boy pants and go to work.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Single again....?

The wife had to fly away to South America for a family emergency. So for the next 2 weeks I am living the life of a single dad of 2 wild monkeys. And you know what it?
It is hard as balls! I give mad credit to anyone who finds themselves in the situation where they have to be the parent all alone. I am at my wits end and feeling very lonely at this time. It has been 4 days since I have seen my wife and I need help!
What to do with 2 wild boys I will never know! I am sorry for this post, I am about 8 sheets into the wind with Sailor Jerry Rum and coke so I am all not that coherent! Typing is very laborious and slow. I have been watching zombie movies all night so I am drunk and paranoid!
I must say I have not felt this lonely in a while and do not know what to do with myself. I have come here to spill my drunken guts outs so please forgive the ramblings. The keyboard is most unforgiving when it comes to typo's.
The wife left last Tuesday because her grandmother has serious health issues. I was left with the kids and feeling very over whelmed and stressed. Tonight I downed some Sailor Jerry rum so the key board isn't working out too well. I have not felt this lonely in such a long time I am not sure what to do with it.
This very post is a testament to patience, I have tried with all my might not to pass out working on this. I do not pray but my prayers go out to her tonight. I do not know what I would do with out her. She is my world and my end all. I am at a lost for words, maybe its because I am too drunk to continue or it is because I truly do not know what to do with myself without her............................which ever I have to end this post the back spacing is killing me......I will be back with a much sober rant about something in the near future.......night yalll!!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Skool is kewl

Between work, skool and family I have been a busy bee. There are a few things I would like to put into the old blog before I am whisked away from my computer again to do something that does not have to do with my personal fun time.



  • Seth has been diagnosed as having ADHD and will be starting meds this weekend. We have tried to just brush it off as him just being an overactive boy but it is really hindering him in many ways in school. So we went to the doctors, had all of his teachers evaluate him and in the end the doc gave us kiddie uppers. I trust this doctor, we have been going to him since they where born and he isnt a pill popping doc. He is the kind to send you home with a note that says, 'You have a cold so suck it up.' He has been doing this for 30 years and has been through many cases just like this so I have some faith in him. I dont want to put my kid on meds at such an early age but his behavior is effecting him at school. And hell after reading all the stuff about it I might be going on the same meds. I was diagnosed many years ago with ADD but was never put on meds. Go mom! But as an adult I am having a really hard time with staying focused and getting work done....hince me here blogging haha! But this weekend will be the first time we all take the blue pill, if he does need it will obvious with in a few moments. If he does not need it, it will also be very obvious because he will bouncing off the walls. It seems that people with ADHD react differently to speed than people who dont have it. That might explains alot with me and why I love the speed ha!

  • Skool has me on edge and it finally came to a head about a week ago with the wife and me had to have a little talk about my attitude. I knew I was being a shit but really could not control it. But after some talking I am going back to the gym to blow off the steam. I have only been to the gym twice so far and it has helped. This week was a wash because of this cold I have. Nothing big just tired with a scratchy throat. But not something you want when trying to work out. I have been thinking about trying some meditation classes, yoga even. But as usual I have been putting off and getting distracted.....oh look a new porn site......

  • Ok I am back! I have to get to the dentist and soon, an old filling fell out and there is a hole in one of my teeth. As soon as i am done here I am off to find his number.

  • An old blogging friend of mine is going to jail this weekend. They have 2 warrants out for their arrest, nothing big just some crap drummed up by a vindictive ex. They're totally stress about it but I am trying to keep them in high spirits by making prison sex jokes and just telling its ok, as long as you dont look down you can pretend its anyone. Lets all take time and wish this person the best. I am not going to spill who this person is because they might not be ready to blog about it yet but I am hoping for the best and after it is all said and done we can move on with a life lesson learned. (Notice I went to great lenghts to keep it as ambiguous as possible. I dont want to call anyone out that isnt ready to be.)

  • I am getting ready for my favorite holiday of all times: Halloween. I have my straight jacket all set, because I am simply just going to be crazy this year. I know not a real far cry for me but hey you have to be true to yourself at all cost.


But it is time for me to run so let me leave you off with a few pictures I have been meaning to put up here:

1) I walked into the living room to see why they where so quiet and this is what I found. To freakin cute not to get a picture of!



2) Yes we own an inflatable air jumper thingie!



3) Trying on my costume, yep it still fits!



4) This is where I want to go for Halloween. It is still up in the air as to where we are going but this is one possibility.



5) I was going to use this as a post but since I have been getting on here so infrequently I thought I would just throw in on here now. I was going through my old high school year books and thought I would share this. This is me in 1994 as a senior at Cranford High school. I weighed about 164lbs here at 6'1. Man on man i would never want to be that skinny again lol.


I hope everyone out there is have a wonderful fall and enjoying the cool weather. The best part of this time of the year.....Apple cider! I am trying to find some place that sells unpasturized apple cider but have not come up with any. I think I will just have to make my own!

Monday, October 05, 2009

Zombieland, hell yeah!

I saw this movie over the weekend with the boys, the older ones mind you. And we freakin loved it! I want to take the wife but after dropping 40 smackers down for 3 tickets and 2 Coke Icies the bank needs some time to recover. But I am all up for seeing this gem of a movie. I love zombie movies and probably have seen all that were really worth seeing, and many that were not worth the film they were put on.
I rank this movie as my all time fav zombie funny movie. There are different types of zombie movies, the Funny and the Dramatic. Funny ones include:
1) Zombieland-2009
2) Shawn of the Dead-2004
3) Dead Alive, it is a hard one to find but a must. Its fucking funny 'I Kick ass for the Lord!'-1992
4) Evil Dead Triolgy
5) Idel Hands (Seth Green is in what can I say?)
6) Return of the Living Dead, its funny in an 80's time capsal kind of way lol-1985
And yes they are in my like order.
Then we have the usual typical dramatic horror zombie movie. It all started back in 1968 with 'Night of the Living Dead' a black in white classic. It is funny now to watch but when I saw it back when I was 10. It scared the living hell out of me! The problem with trying to list zombie movies is that there are soooo many I dont even know where to start. But I will list a few of my favorite:
1) 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later
2) Dawn of the Dead and Day of the Dead, old and new
3) Pet Cemetery
4) Resident Evil
and the list goes on, here go take a look~~~~> Zombies
To wrap this up I totaly endorse this movie and will going to see it again very soon! I wont give anything away because the suprises are really worth waiting for. The story is well played out and the humor factor is a gas!
Now I am off to do some more school work.....whoopie!