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I live in the state of constant confusion. Its the state colored blue on the map. And yes I can find any place on the globe, its all color cordinated! (duh)Asia is pink, England is green and France ....well France felt they were soo much better than everone else they have become their own planet.

Thursday, October 04, 2007

Legs of Fire!

Well the Total Gym is going great, and I am getting more used to it. The spirit of Chuck is with me! I also started running this week, god I hate running. I went Monday and I went again this morning. And for those of you who know me you will know that me getting up any earlier than my normal 0600 is a freaking mirical! I have been getting up at 0455 and out the door by 0505. I run around this park by my house which is at least 1/4 of a mile round. I actually think it is bigger than that but not by much. And what I love about running around this park is it is smi-ghetto and you never know what fun things you will spot while runnning. On Monday I saw a man sitting on one of the exercise station smoking weed. I personally could careless about some one getting there 'wake'n'bake' on but its fuking 0530 in the morning. Who the hell getts up that early and thinks, 'Dude, I sooo need a joint right now?'

Then today I saw some dude doing salsa dancing in the park all by himself. I was doing some chin ups and leg lifts and I see thie guy I saw earlier running dancing. At first I just thought he was doing thi chi or some type of soccer drill but then I got a better look and he was a solo dancin fool! Well, I wish I could dance that good with another person let alone by myself in a dark park lol.

ThenI saw beer bottles at the push up station and several empty baggies, and yes I checked! You see running in the urban landscape helps take the mind off the fact your legs are on fire. The first day was not so bad but the second time was pure hell. My legs were still hurting from Mondays abuse but I pushed passed it. I daydream about running a 5K race and actually finishing. Its called projecting, it helps when I fell like stopping. I also curse at myself, I pray I never start that Ipod talking. You know when you have your Ipod on too loud and you dont notice that other ppl can hear you talking to yourself but you cannt hear you. Because if I ever do ppl walking by me will get the fuk out of my way. What would you do if you heard some guy coming up behind you saying this:

" What the fuk is wrong with you, you lazy shit, yeah I am talking to you, you're weak you, you're patatic, you make me sick, burns doesnt it you little faggot, move your ass, you want those abs dont you they wont grow on there own you studid shit!"

Now, me personally I would more out of his way and wonder how he stole my internal monolog. I have made a resolution to end all others, this time I want it more than ever. Everyone I knew when we were skinny has gotten bigger. I dont want that for me, now I dont really mind or care about their girt. It doesnt bother me, and hey if they are happy who am I to look down on them. But I am not happy with what I have done to myself, and I am now focused on fixing it. I am getting my eating under control, I use Sparkpeople.com religously and have it up on my work pc from the time I get in to the time I leave. I drink over 10 glasses of water a day and I am no longer making excuses. I just have to work on my weekends, it seems this is when I lose it. One cheat day is normal but i tend to push it for 3, Friday to Sunday. I am bad on the weekends, I am not about to give up my cheat day I just have to keep it to one day and one day only.
Now speaking of weekend I have some pics from last weekend. Mr. NoNo's was put in gymnastics but he wanted nothing to do with it. It is a free class that the township put on and all I can say about it is: Disorganization. There was no order, no instructions and no structure anywhere. We get there and they take our paper work and send us in to this gym with about 100+ little screaming mosters. Everyone looks lost and I bet half of them dont speak a word of english. I get my monster in a line, not sure what the line was for but they all had their shoes off and heading towards a matted area. He wasnt to cool with this part, but as long as he could see me he was sitting with these other beast. Well, finally someone in charge says something:
" Ok parents we need you to go sit over there please"
Now, mind you 'over there' was on the other side of this huge gym. I am not sure I could have thrown a baseball to where we were to sit and I knew my kid would freak if I went that far. Well, I never made it that far, after the announcement (that no one paid any attention to) they were told to stand up and walk to the next mat; he bolted over to me and would not let go of my leg. I suddenly had a child size tumor on my leg. He wasnt crying but he was not happy. So in the end we just left, I was by myself with 2 little monsters and one of them was a drunkin midget who suddenly got 'the fear' And anyone that knows what that is knows there is no looking back, all you can do is walk, stummble crawl away. We walked, but man oh man they should serve booze at these things!
Mine is the one in the middle with his 'angry eyes' on.
The later that morning the sister in law came over and helped clean while the wife unit was working. To bad she could have helped me with midget man earlier but whatever. After several hours of playing house slave she passed out on the couch. I was sooo tempted to draw on her face with a marker but the only ones I found were the permanate kind. And I am an evil bastard but not that bad, but you would have to admit having a penis drawn in permanate maker on your face would be some funny shit!
Then later whe all went to the inlaws house and the mother in law bought cheese one of those push/pull/ride toys. I had to assemble the damn thing and I only had to unscrew it once to get it right lol. But in the end he was having a ball.
All in all it was a good weekend, ate and drank too much. Like I said weekends are where I need work, better luck next weekend.

6 comments:

Martini said...

People with ipods in their ears bother me. They pay attention to nothing.

A university student wearing one got run over by a city work truck while jay-walking, right by my house. Now, I feel badly for the family because that is a horrible thing to experience - but it was her own stupidity that got her killed. That and a stupid, stupid iPod.

And as a result, the city put stoplights in the middle of the road and lowered the speed limit. All because of a girl who didn't use common sense.

cher said...

my home gym is still my coat rack. but you are making me feel a bit guilty more and more about it.

man your kid is cute.

the felt maker would have been great!

prettykitty said...

i love running around the (man made) lake by my house. the homeless community that camp out there at dusk look at me like i'm a total idiot. if i wanted to stay in shape i should be starving myself and walk around all day pushing a shopping cart full of useless stuff. i don't talk with the iPod on, but i do smile and sing along like a lunatic which people either find amusing, crazy or plain annoying depending on their mood.

i love how your sister in law fell asleep filing her nails. that's really hard work getting them all even and stuff.

oh and dude, you can totally do a 5k. it's a no brainer.

Mimi said...

At least you only have legs of fire and not an ass of fire. Chuck Norris would not approve of that. I could jog around the park in my town, it would take about 5mins considering my yard is bigger than the park. But it would be neat to tell people that jogged in the park, they would be impressed, however, the locals would think I'm nuts for running around a grassy circle.

morbid misanthrope said...

There's an interesting homeless community in the new city I'm living in now. I've decided to make them all my allies, or, minions, if you will.

Every week, I hand out dollar bills and clean syringes, so the next time I need to mobilize some troops to storm a structure of some kind, toothless Charlie and his homeless junkie brigade will form the front lines. If there's one thing I know how to do, it's organize an army comprised of criminally insane drifters with substance abuse problems.

Becky said...

I so need some motivation like you have, or like you are making it seem like you have. I bought an elliptical and have used it like twice, so has the husband. Someone needs to light a fire under my ass.